Crematorium part 3

March 23, 2022

7 minutes read

Some time ago, STC councillors received an invitation from BDC to take a trip to Hambleton Crematorium. This trip was organised to familiarise councillors with a modern crematorium, its costs, and how it works, so STC councillors should be more knowledgeable about it when the time comes to decide on building a crematorium in our town.

Out of all 16 STC councillors, I was the only one who accepted the invitation and went to Hambleton Crematorium. I must stress that maybe more STC councillors would have gone on this trip, but BDC first gave us 3 hours to decide on the whole day trip, and when no one but me came forward- BDC cancelled the entire trip. I didn’t give up and got in touch with Humbleton District Council staff so I could visit the site on my own, get to know it better and report back to my readers and constituents. Finally, when HDC agreed to accommodate me- I went there alone and at my own cost. I think it was money and time well spent. Why? The answer is below.

LOCATION LOCATION LOCATION
The location of the crematorium is a critical factor in determining its viability. Hambleton Council chose to locate its crematorium away from residential buildings on the accessible A63 road, just a few miles from the junction with the A1. However, ease of access is not the only reason for choosing this location. Council staff placed the crematorium at this location because there was no other crematorium nearby. The nearest crematoria are in York and Harrogate – 30 miles away.

What will it look like for a possible crematorium at Shirebrook? Well, the nearest two crematoria are in Mansfield and Chesterfield. The market for burials can therefore be expected to be very shallow, much smaller than in Hambleton. That is a severe disadvantage.

NEW AND ALREADY BATTERED BY THREE STORMS
The visit took place in the immediate aftermath of three massive storms over the UK. Outside, the effects of the heavy rainfall could be easily seen – large areas of land that are to be covered by lawns in the future have turned into brown swamps. In addition, carefully designed spaces that will one day be covered in greenery on the day of the visit were covered in ruts carved by the enormity of the rainwater streaming down the site.

One of the guests’ cars veered off the new asphalt road, buried itself in the soggy ground and left ugly tyre prints in the carefully manicured lawn. However, apart from the difficulties caused by the storms, the weather on the day of the visit was beautiful, albeit windy. Thanks to the sunshine, I managed to take some really nice-looking pictures of the outside of the building. The building itself looks dignified and modest at the same time. I must point out that it looks almost identical to what was presented to Shirebrook residents on the designers’ drawings.

Although the photos were quite good, I must stress that the building looks much better in real life. Nevertheless, the images are very reminiscent of illustrations made by a computer graphic designer, which I presented in the article “Crematorium part 2”. All the pictures on which there are no living people look as if taken straight from a computer. However, as soon as people appear in the lens, the pictures do not look artificial.

WHAT’S IMPORTANT IS WHAT’S ON THE INSIDE
Of course, Hambleton Crematorium was not yet open at the tour time. So I could see every room without fear of disturbing anyone’s grief. The interior of the building is decorated with taste and modesty. The main hall has a high ceiling which provides a sense of class. Ample seating and a decent sound system ensure that even the largest funerals can accommodate all mourners. A large number of windows provide good lighting.

WHAT UNDER THE BONNET
Hambleton Council has opted for an electric crematorium. I witnessed the new head of the place talking to visitors. A large part of the conversation was taken up with the incineration system. For a long time, a staff member explained to the audience why an electric furnace had been chosen and what advantages it offered over a gas furnace. The only disadvantage is that it takes longer to burn a corpse, which can be up to four hours, depending on the body’s weight.

The incinerator itself does not look particularly interesting. There is nothing interesting to say about it, except that HDC has left the room to add another if the service’s interest exceeds their expectations.

Hambleton Council has put a lot of emphasis on cleanliness of operations, so a lot of money has been spent on filtration systems. As you can see from the photo showing the back of the building- the chimney is tiny as most of the smoke is filtered so effectively that it was unnecessary to build a larger one. You can also see the cafe where the mourners can meet after the ceremony in the same photo.

MEMORIAL GARDEN
The BDC is planning to build a similar but much bigger memorial garden. So I may again come across as a materialist in this paragraph. Still, someone has to think about money, and Labour seems to take a reckless approach to anything money-related. So it seems to me that both in Hambleton and on the plans submitted by BDC- the garden takes up far too much space. (picture shows only a small part of the garden)

In my opinion, the garden area should be halved. The space reclaimed should be used for solar panels, recovering energy and reducing the cost of running the crematorium. On the other hand, a more extensive garden means a higher maintenance cost. Furthermore, it seems that few people will want to walk around and admire the strangely trimmed bushes right after they say goodbye to their loved ones.

The garden at Hambleton is overwhelmingly large. The BDC plans show that the one planned at Shirebrook is to be at least twice as large, with additional water features(?!?). In my opinion, this is a wasteful solution.

It seems that the roof of any modern building should be equipped with solar panels. Due to the east-west orientation of the building and the sloping roof: the part of the roof where the panels would be most effective is entirely invisible to Crematorium guests. Not having the panels on the roof is a missed opportunity to increase the return on investment.

LAND PLOT
This is probably the only big argument ‘in favour’ on the Shirebrook side. The plot on which the crematorium is planned to be built is not suitable for anything else. Nobody will want to put a house or a shop there, and creating an industrial estate there would insult the dignity of those buried behind the fence.

Moreover, if the agreement between STC and BDC is well structured, Shirebrook is not risking anything. The township only contributes land, and if the deal includes a point that if the project fails, the land will remain the property of STC: nothing is at risk. In addition, BDC will bear the cost of building and equipping the crematorium. This is another big plus.

However, there is a considerable risk here: STC is known for signing unfavourable contracts. 140,000 for a toilet in Market Square, and we still pay close to 20,000 each year for it; solar panels on the Leisure Centre that give us such savings that we have to pay 10,000 a year for it plus a heating system that even in August costs £2,000. All these deals are incredibly disadvantageous to the taxpayer in Shirebrook. All these deals are covered in secret, so apart from a handful of Labour Party politicians-no one really knows what is in these deals. We paid for this with our own money, but Labour Party councillors are careful to ensure that the people who paid for it don’t know what they really paid for.

Hence, I fear that the BDC will use the STC for its own purposes, and we, the taxpayers who pay into the STC- will be left with no answers to any questions and huge bills to pay.

WILL IT BE PROFITABLE?
I do not know. I don’t think anyone knows 100%, but if the BDC wants to invest 11 million, they have reasons to forecast profits. Where did I get the 11 million from? That’s what the Crematorium in Hambleton cost. I doubt that BDC would be able to build ours cheaper.

Who really decides the profitability of such an enterprise is… Funeral Directors. That’s why Hambleton Council has invited a whole host of them. Often their decisions and the advice they give to the families of the deceased will determine where mourners will say goodbye to their loved ones. As a member of HDC staff pointed out to me, there is no hope of financial success for the venture without their (Funeral Directors) advertising and willingness to use a crematorium here rather than a competitor’s. If you want to know how much Crematorium services cost I attached the price list at the bottom of the article.

In the case of Hambleton- there is no competition nearby. In the case of Shirebrook- competition is literally in the town next door. In the two towns next door so prices need to be competitive.

CONCLUSION
I still believe that this investment will not be too great an interference in the life of our town, and it may bring tangible financial benefits and several jobs. The land earmarked for investment will not arouse the interest of any investor anyway, as it lies next to the cemetery. This plot is perfect for this investment. If the BDC wants to bear all the costs, we should not stand in their way, as long as they guarantee that the land will remain the town’s property if the crematorium is closed.

Having said that, I must admit that after visiting Humbleton- there were some initial concerns in my mind. Why? Well, I have been a councillor for almost a year. In that time, I have seen countless times that the STC run by Chris Kane and Steve Fritchley is a haven of incompetence, concealment of facts, unnecessary spending and a complete lack of control over what goes on. I simply don’t believe that STC is in a position to sign off a deal beneficial to the town- I am 99% sure that the facts about this deal will be carefully concealed by Labour Party councillors.

Just like the deal to borrow money to build Town Hall, just like the deal to install panels on the LC, just like the deal for the heating system in the LC, just like the negotiations to repay the debt incurred by the Labour Party. Nothing is transparent in Shirebrook – hence my concern that the crematorium won’t be either.